Re: Differences
Of course it’s easier for me to tell anyone, not just Jack, things than my family, or what’s left of it. I honestly can’t remember the last time I had any kind of conversation with my dad. Still, I can talk to Jack about things and know he’ll listen and understand, which I couldn’t have done with Damien. My mum’s death was something I was smart enough not to bring up with Damien, but Jack understands how I feel about it. He’s really interested in how people cope with losing someone.
Having faith in myself isn’t quite the same as having a religion to follow. Christianity doesn’t have bad things happen to it. At the end of the day, it’ll still be there no matter what happens. Christianity doesn’t make me hate it when bad things happen. I can’t say the same about myself.
When you say people feel like they’ve lost something, that’s EXACTLY how I feel. It feels like there’s a big hole in me and I’m less of a person now than I used to be. I don’t want to do anything that’ll make Jack feel that way too. I see how happy he is being a Christian and wish I could still feel that way. It feels wrong not following the Bible like I used to. Mum would be so disappointed in me.
I suppose it’s in everyone’s interests to have a day like that though. Everyone has to rest some time, so why not have everyone resting on the same day? The world doesn’t really work that way any more though, because shops still open and everything even on a Sunday now. Sunday could be any other day of the week now. Of course, there is resting and then taking it to the extreme. Resting should be relaxing. Some Jews won’t turn on the TV because it’s work, they won’t cook food because it’s work. If that was me, I’d hate the day which was supposed to be for rest. I’d be bored out of my head. I don’t think a day of rest and worship should be a chore.
I could do perfectly well without a lot of things. It doesn’t mean I can get rid of them though.
Gabriel, have you been watching me in the shower? Stop it! Seriously! I was beginning to like you. I know you’re the angel of perversity and it’s probably beyond you to stop, but you can certainly watch someone else instead. What happened to all the compassion you’d supposedly gotten from Michael?
It’s different with brothers and sisters, because you’re stuck with them even if you hate each other, but with friends you have much more of a choice. You wouldn’t be friends with them if you didn’t like each other. It’s not really that different to you. If you realised one day you suddenly hated Michael, would you both still be together? What if he did something that was totally unforgivable?
Do you think Damien knows I have the photo of him? That would be interesting. I know how I’d feel if someone I knew had a photo of me like that. Having said that though, I like to think I’d never have anything like that happen to me.
Maybe I should forget about the Ten Commandments, since I’ve gotten rid of everything else left in the Bible, but how else can you decide on what’s the right thing to do? How do you decide? You’re probably not the best person to ask that question, actually. You watch me in the shower and don’t have a problem with it. How does Michael decide what’s the best thing to do?
-Poppy
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